


Outstanding Smooch

by sardonyx164



Series: Operation Adulation (A Disastrous Upheaval Liquidates and Tortures Inconsonant Overwrought Nigel) [4]
Category: Codename: Kids Next Door
Genre: Fluff, Gen, Platonic Kissing, Playful teasing, Screenplay/Script Format
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-16
Updated: 2020-05-16
Packaged: 2021-03-03 00:28:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,407
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24215923
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sardonyx164/pseuds/sardonyx164
Summary: Nigel is too shy to kiss Chad. Chad has to guide him in the right direction.
Relationships: Nigel Uno & Chad Dickson
Series: Operation Adulation (A Disastrous Upheaval Liquidates and Tortures Inconsonant Overwrought Nigel) [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1738531
Kudos: 6
Collections: Operation Friend





	Outstanding Smooch

**Author's Note:**

> There's an article on TV Tropes that talks about the "nobody calls me chicken" trope, and how tricky mentors can use this trope on purpose to get the protagonist to do something they're unlikely to do.  
> [Link is here:]  
> https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/NobodyCallsMeChicken
> 
> ...And now you know what inspired this story.
> 
> (People who know about Team Fortress 2 will probably think of the whole 'Seduce me' dialogue. However, I'm not sure what would be funnier: Chad saying 'Seduce me' or Nigel himself saying 'Seduce me'.)

_[Scene: outside the Arctic Base, during the evening. Chad is watching Nigel with pride as the younger boy flies around with his jet boots]_

**Nigel:** [excited] Sir! Look at me! I’m flying! [twirling around] Yahoo!

 **Chad:** [chuckling lovingly] (Man, that kid is adorable. He’s even more adorable when he’s happy. I could watch him fly for hours...hmm, I wonder if there’s a way to make him even _more_ adorable...?)

_[Chad thinks for a bit...and then his face lights up with realization just as the light post abouve him turns on]_

**Chad:** (Wait, that’s it!) [calling out to Nigel] Hey! Hey, kid!

 **Nigel:** [looking down at Chad] What is it, sir?

 **Chad:** Come over here! I want to tell you something!

_[Nigel hovers down to the ground and deactivates his jet boots. Nigel then eagerly walks up to Chad]_

**Nigel:** Um, what did you want to tell me?

 **Chad:** Well, I just...wanted to tell you that you’re doing really well.

 **Nigel:** [bashfully toeing at the floor] Oh, well, thank you, sir.

 **Chad:** Hey, are you having any more anxious or otherwise negative thoughts?

 **Nigel:** Well, uh, they still show up from time to time, but they’re far less frequent than when I first got here. [scratching the back of his neck] I don’t know how I would have managed without you, sir.

 **Chad:** [softly] Oh, come now. You and I both know that this is all _your_ doing. I mean, sure, I gave you a lot of encouragement--

 **Nigel:** [blushing] A _lot_ of encouragement...

 **Chad:** \--but _you’re_ the one who decided to listen to what I had to say. [putting his hand on Nigel’s shoulder] _You’re_ the one who decided that it was time to change yourself for the better.

 **Nigel:** [smiling] Stop it, sir. You’re going to make me cry...

 **Chad** : [patting Nigel’s shoulder] Alright, I’ll stop. Um, so...is there anything else you want to do today, Nigel? [Nigel raises his hand]...Anything _besides_ giving you more, um, encouragement?

 **Nigel:** [lowering his hand] Um, well...could we fly around leisurely under the beautiful night sky?

 **Chad:** Sure thing! [activating his jetpack] But you’ll have to catch me first!

_[Chad rockets upward a few feet...and then slowly hovers back down to Nigel when he realizes that the younger boy isn’t chasing him]_

**Chad:** I said, ‘but you’ll have to catch me first’.

 **Nigel:** Well, I, uh, don’t know if I can catch you, sir. I mean, you’re the best for a reason and--

 **Chad:** [smirking] What are you, chicken?

_[Nigel’s face turns red with rage as Chad makes chicken sounds. After a few moments, Nigel abruptly grabs Chad by the collar, yanks the older boy toward him, and gives him an icy look]_

**Nigel** : [speaking like a drill sergeant] You _dare_ call me a chicken, soldier?! Why, chickens are pretty much modern day dinosaurs! So by calling me a chicken, you’re pretty much saying that I’m the coolest thing ever! Is that clear?! [Chad stammers] I asked you a _question_! Is! That! _Clear_?!

 **Chad:** Uh, yes...(Wow...what a guy...)

 **Nigel:** And another thing, Chad! You think _your_ kisses are good?! Well, _mine_ are even better! And I’ll prove it to you _right now_!

_[Nigel hesitates and starts shaking, but still keeps up his icy look. Chad’s blank expression slowly turns into a smug yet playful look]_

**Chad:** What are you waiting for~? I know you want to kiss me, Nigel. _You_ know you want to kiss me. What’s taking so long~?

 **Nigel:** [mousy] Um...is it really okay for me to kiss you, sir?

 **Chad:** [tracing his finger along Nigel’s shoulder] Of course it is. But it’s just so _unfair,_ you know~? I kissed you so many times already... [whispering into Nigel’s ear]... but you didn’t even kiss me _once._

_[Nigel stammers, which allows Chad the chance to gently take Nigel’s hands off of him. Chad then overdramatically wipes his brow]_

**Chad:** (Just _kiss_ me already, you idiot! Hmm, maybe _this_ will work...) My, my. It sure is hot out here. I need to take off my helmet...

 **Nigel:** But, sir...it’s the Arctic! How can you be...hot...?

_[Nigel can’t help but stare as he watches Chad slowly take off his helmet and shake his hair a bit. He notices Nigel staring and stammering, which Chad reacts to with a wink]_

**Chad** : Oh? Do I have something on my face? [Nigel shakes his head] Ah, I get it. You just like looking at me, don’t you~? You think I’m _really_ pretty, don’t you~?

 **Nigel:** No, I mean, yes! [quickly] I mean, you _are_ very pretty, don’t get me wrong, but...uh, I don’t want you to think of yourself as _just_ a pretty boy, you know? Beauty isn’t everything, and I think you’d be better off if you weren’t beautiful...[Chad chuckles]...no no no, wait! I mean, that way you’d know for sure if someone likes you for _you,_ you know? I mean, there’s so much more to you than your beauty! You have such a kind and playful nature, and you give such nice kisses--

 **Chad:** [putting his finger on Nigel’s lips] Ssh, ssh, ssh. You gotta let the other person have a word in, you know~? Now then...[caressing Nigel’s cheek]...there’s something I must confess. I’m not a big fan of romance or any gesture that’s more... _intimate_ than kisses. But do you know what I _am_ a big fan of?

 **Nigel** : [muffled] What?

 **Chad:** Your reactions when I... _play_ with you like this. Hmm, tell me...[taking his finger off of Nigel’s lips]...do you like it when I act like this toward you~?

 **Nigel** : [lovestruck] Oh, _yes_...It seems like I forget all of my troubles when I’m with you...

 **Chad** : [sighing lovingly] That’s good to hear.

_[Chad suddenly pushes Nigel away and turns his back to him]_

**Chad:** (I almost got him...just a bit more...) [sadly] But it is quite a shame...

 **Nigel:** [worried] Sir...? Are you alright?

 **Chad:** [overdramatically] No, I’m not alright! I would enjoy our relationship _far_ more if you kissed me, Nigel! Ah, but apparently you’re too much of a _chicken_ to go through with it...[glancing back at Nigel]... aren’t you?!

 **Nigel:** [angrily] Chicken...?!

 **Chad:** Yes, Numbuh One! [jabbing Nigel’s chest with his finger] You are an absolute _chicken_!

_[Nigel growls and grabs Chad by the collar again]_

**Nigel:** [speaking with his drill sergeant voice again] That’s _it!_ I have had _enough_ of your insults, soldier!

 **Chad:** [mousy] Uh...(Is he going to...?!)

 **Nigel:** [putting his fingers over Chad’s lips] Shut up already, soldier! I _will_ show you that I am _not_ a chicken! Now _get over here_!

_[Nigel pulls Chad toward him and kisses the older boy on his (finger-blocked) lips]_

**Chad:** [humming happily and closing his eyes] (Got him...man, he’s such a great kisser...!)

_[Nigel pulls away from the kiss after a few moments and pushes Chad away. Nigel then angrily points at Chad, who has a big smile on his face]_

**Nigel:** That will teach you to call me a chicken, soldier! What do you have to say for yourself?!

 **Chad** : [blushing] What, huh? [chuckling] If this was a cartoon, my heart would be popping out of my chest right about now...

 **Nigel:** What?! That’s all you have to say for yourself?! I’m ashamed of--

_[Chad puts his hand over Nigel’s mouth and starts stroking the younger boy’s scalp; the gentle touch makes Nigel calm down]_

**Chad:** [proudly] Nigel, hey. Listen. _That_ was awesome. Simply awesome. You used the element of surprise really well, kid. [winking at Nigel again] Excellent work. [taking his hand off of Nigel’s mouth] How are you feeling? (I know how _I_ feel...absolutely _amazing_!)

 **Nigel:** [toeing at the ground sheepishly] Um...you’re not mad at me for kissing you...?

 **Chad:** [gently kissing Nigel on the scalp] Now why would I be mad? [tilting Nigel’s chin up] I thought that kiss was the best thing ever. You _seriously_ need to kiss me more, understand?

 **Nigel:** [slowly smiling] Yes. I understand, sir.

 **Chad** : [pulling Nigel into a hug] I’m so proud of you, Nigel.

 **Nigel:** [happily returning the hug] Thank you, sir. Not just for being my mentor, but for being my friend, too. [tearing up] You make me really happy, sir...

 **Chad:** [rubbing Nigel’s back] It was no trouble, Nigel. [softly kissing Nigel’s temple] You deserve to be happy.

End

**Author's Note:**

> -In this house, we don't use "triggered' to describe Nigel's rage. He's offended. He's angry.  
> Got it?
> 
> Here's a simple way to put it:  
> Nigel being triggered: Someone reminds Nigel of his horrible incident with the Delightful Children.  
> Nigel being offended/angry: Nigel being called a chicken.
> 
> -This is another one of my more popular fics. I like this one a lot, too.  
> Not just because of Chad getting Nigel to kiss him, but also because of Chad saying "You are an absolute chicken!". Every time I see that line, I can't help but chuckle.
> 
> -For maximum emotional effect, play Eric Carmen's "Hungry Eyes". Bonus points for playing the chorus of that song when Chad takes off his helmet.
> 
> PS: Related articles:  
> https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/CluckingFunny  
> https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Funny/TeamFortress2OfficialVideos


End file.
